There is another presence growing inside me

Since I learnt that I was pregnant, I have done the normal thing of checking the internet pictures of growth – seeing what my baby looks like as every week progresses. However, they are only images, and initially it still felt quite surreal/distant. At about 7 weeks it suddenly dawned on me that what was growing inside me wasn’t just an extension of my internal organs, an “an organic growth with future potential” (too bleak?!) but was something utterly separate from me. It was a new being, a new presence.

A new “self”. We as human beings are all very distinct from each other. Our sense of “self” is extremely strong so much so that we cannot engage on any meaningful level with someone else unless we are willing communicate to that person information about what is in our private self. We cannot read each others thoughts; we are intensely private beings by nature. So it is mind blowing to imagine what is going on inside my womb as this little being starts to be formed into a “self” with consciousness. I imagine the experience almost like waking up very very slowly from a very long sleep.

At what point a soul is born, I’m not sure. The Bible tells us that God is knitting my child together in my womb and that God is creating its “innermost being” (Psalm 139:13). But I suppose the birthing of this “innermost being” is a miraculous, God breathed birthing process, like a 9 month long labour without the pain. And this new being does not belong to me, it is not ‘mine’ but God’s (but that is a subject for another blog post!).

This little being has a whole, separate future stretched out in front of it. God has given me the honour of raising it initially, but it will go on, away from me to live its own life. Whilst now it seems like “an extension of me” that is far from the truth.

When I finally meet this little being face to face, and continue the journey of getting to know its private self, its uniqueness, its little quirks, its thoughts, I can rest in the knowledge that God is our Creator, creating life and soul and ‘being’ from sperm and egg, and he is also our Sustainer, sustaining the life of this little being, until this little being is called home.

Whilst not showing you a soul being born, this amazing YouTube animation shows you the epic development of little beings from sperm to birth.

Appetite of a Toddler

I haven’t suffered a great deal with morning sickness per se, but around the 6 week mark what was really noticeable was that my whole entire diet and appetite changed.

From having an Ottolenghi style salad (that included a huge range of things such as yellow courgette, aubergine, fish, beans, seeds, nuts, black carrots) every single day at work, suddenly the thought of it made me feel sick and I could just about muster up enough appetite for plain rice.

I pride myself with LOVING all food and being confident in the knowledge that I can go around anyone’s house for dinner and absolutely love what is cooked for me, no matter what that was.

No longer! I completely went off vegetables and anything particularly flavoursome. Basically I adopted the appetite of our 3 year old nephew, and had to continually remind Tom of that much to his confusion. Plain pasta, yes please. Plain rice, yep!

This was a bit of an unexpected identity crisis, and gave me a glimpse into the world of people who are very fussy. It is not fun!!

I remember trepidly trying a green olive and yelping when I discovered that I liked it! (maybe the salty brine??). I had to re-learn all over again, what foods I could tolerate and what foods were off the menu.

A bit of an odd pregnancy symptom, but preferable to severe morning sickness which I know many have to endure. Luckily, by about 15 weeks my appetite seemed to go back to normal, but I still haven’t quite managed my daily salads yet.

Easy peasy reupholstery

A contradiction in terms? Well not for these chairs!

This happened to be the DIY project that caused us the least amount of time and pain but still had maximum results. That’s the sort of DIY project worth sharing. Thank you to TP for the superb modelling.

What you need:

1. Chairs

Old chairs, new chairs, cheap pine chairs, scratched chairs, mis match chairs, chairs found in a dustbin – all fine so long as they have a cushioned seat which is removable and pops out from the frame.

Seriously, an old, grotty, scratched chair has the potential to look great with some brand new upholstery.

2. Fabric

Don’t skimp out on quality, make sure you get the heavier upholstery fabric. A fat quarter should be plenty per chair.

However, it doesn’t mean you have to spend a fortune – if you like the mis match look (I love this) then you can get amazing deals on eBay by looking out for off cuts. Stick to a theme such as a certain designer (I love Skinny laMinx and Lucienne Day), colour or style. As you just need each fabric panel to cover the cushion seat, you don’t need much fabric per chair so off cuts are perfect.

3. Staple gun. Beg, steal, borrow or buy (I have actually found ours surprisingly useful).

What to do.

1. Unscrew the cushion seats.

2. Wrap the fabric over the chair, positioning the design as you want.

We were able to wrap the fabric straight over the old stuff without removing anything – but check that this won’t be too bulky to re-insert into the chair before stapling.

3. Turn over the cushion, stretch the fabric gently and create folds over the corners ready for stapling.

4. Staple.

5. Finish off stretching, folding and stapling the other corners and sides, then trim the surplus fabric.

6. Insert back into the chair and screw down.

That is basically it! Here are our finished chairs:

If you are tempted to try this, send me photos of your finished results!

Chairs: 2nd hand eBay buy, originally Laura Ashley “Garrat”. Fabric: Skinny laMinx solid Orla